When I was little, I never pictured myself living like this. I never imagined myself taking a razor to my wrist. I never thought I would live every day like a burden. I never expected to wish so much that I'd never wake up before I went to bed every night. I saw myself going shopping with my tons of friends. I imagined I would go to prom, be a cheerleader, have a fabulous boyfriend. I thought I would love my life and everything about it. What happened? Where did I go wrong?
It's true what they say: Every time I ever let any one close to me, they leave! Just like that! They either hurt or leaves me, and he's exactly the same!
I trust him so much that it scares me!
He knows every little thing about me that he could write a book about my life.
He knows about the depression, self harm, suicide, everything!
He means everything to me, while I mean absolutely nothing to him!
And now he’s leaving me. Just like that, without a second thought!
It’s not even like its a different part of the country, it’s 3800 miles away!
I shouldn’t let it affect me the way I do, but I can’t just accept the fact that he’s going! The only person I have ever trusted is leaving me in a world where I only feel ok when he’s around!
And to feel this way, it’s pathetic! I’ve known him for 6 months, maybe not even that! But I really do feel ok when he’s around! Safe even! I trust him with everything I have, I miss him when I’m not with him after a few hours, he’s the one that can make me smile when I feel like crying, he’s the one that pisses me off, yet when I’m angry, he’s the only one that can calm me! He’s the one that asks if I’m ok and keep asking until I tell him! Or makes sure I’m somewhat ok if i won’t!
I shouldn’t feel this way, but I do! And that terrifies me: that he can mean so much to me, while I mean so little to him!
There's just something about you. Maybe it’s your smile. Or your laugh. Or your voice. Maybe it’s your sense of humor, or the way you comfort me. Maybe it’s the way I felt safe and secure when I was in your arms, or the way you look at me. I don’t know, but whatever it is, it makes everything feel like it’s okay. Maybe that’s why it’s so hard for me to let you go.
It's amazing how I can hide my suicidal mind with just a smile. How I can hide my scars and cuts with a hoodie and say I'm cold. How I can tell people I'm fine and they believe me. How I can tell people I ate a big breakfast so I don't have to eat lunch, when I really didn't eat breakfast. How I can tell people I didn't sleep good when my eyes are puffy from crying uncontrollably. It just amazes me how much I can hide.
um sorry to bother! But I just cut my hip like where I normally would, but I went deeper than I ever have before and i saw like white-ish underneath before it started bleeding. Do you happen to know what this is, or if I need to treat it any differently to any of my other cuts? Thanks, sorry again ♥ x
It will probably be the fat tissue!
It depends how deep it is, if it doesnt stop bleeding after 5 minutes, it will most likely need stitches! If you cant get them due to whatever reason, keep applying pressure until it does stop. Apply a bandage and keep checking up on it every day! if it becomes infected, then you will need to see a doctor!
Loving a band with all your heart is something you only understand when it happens to you. On the surface, others can see it as a petty obsession, but they’ll just never know the feeling of putting so much faith into a few people on the other side of the world. It’s hard to explain it to them, the listening to song after song on repeat, the waits for new albums, the excitement and surreal sensation when you finally see them live. They don’t seem to understand why the lyrics booklets give you a sense of comfort, or why you paste photos of them all over your bedroom walls. And they can’t understand why one band could matter to you so much. And you think to yourself ‘Because they saved my life.’ But you say nothing, they wouldn’t understand.
Hello! We are a little charity group who are trying to raise money and awareness for teenage depression and self harm. Were trying to get a few more people involved, it would be great if you could check out our sign page and perhaps submit us a photo, done like that and also tell your followers about us! Thank you for your time! :D
“Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”
“Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it. Life is too precious, do not destroy it. Life is life, fight for it.”
to the person that wants to kill yourself, dont. believe me, you have so much to live for. you have barely expierenced life! its good to hit rock bottom, because there is no other way but up after that. please, dont. if i didnt care, i wouldnt be writing this. "its always darkest just before the dawm, so stay awake with me, lets prove them wrong." -rise against
I want to kill myself. My friends all left me when one of them saw my bandages around my wrists. I don't want to live anymore. I've been put in hospitals multiple times for attempted suicide. I'm not worth the air I'm breathing. I can't remember how many times I've tried to commit suicide, and my parents throw me out of the house whenever they see that I've cut. I really don't see another way out. I don't know what to do. Help?
Talk to someone! A Doctor, someone you trust, or use the hotlines on my page! They help, they really do!! Honest!
Or continue talking to me! Whatever you feel right now, things can only get better!!
You are worth the air you are breathing, trust me!
people do care about you, they might just not show it!
I really need to talk to someone, but I can't. I'll always be around to listen to my friends' problems, but I can't talk to them about mine. I feel like an attention seeker if I do.
Yes you can.
Say this to your friends. Approach your closest friend. Ask them to talk with you. Tell them how you feel and the fact that you didn’t tell them before because you didn’t want to seem like an attention seeker and I’m sure they’ll understand. If you’re always there for them, they’ll be there for you!
I haven't cut for over 7 months, but recently I've been getting the urge to do it again really badly. But I know I can't because it would upset my boyfriend way to much, and I can't do that to him again. But I can't tell anyone 'cause they'll just freak out or get worried 'cause they all think I'm better..
Don’t. The fall won’t be worth it. I haven’t cut for six months and I really badly want to do it again, but I won’t because that sense of failure would kill me. You should say it to someone. There’s no point in keeping it to yourself. Tell someone, they can help. Tell your boyfriend, I’m sure he’d be more than willing to be there for you! Don’t worry.